And just like that it's the end of another month. This month has been a bit rough as expected. What wasn't expected was a new issue dealing with our daycare for B. It was so stressful and rushed. I'm not going to go into detail but it was disappointing and resulting into a daycare overhaul. He hasn't officially moved yet but we will see how that goes.
My Instagram has been steadily gaining more followers. It is very exciting and I am averaging around 40 likes now and almost 200 followers (189 as of today). I completed 2 challenges and nearly completed the bohoberry one. Now it's time for the next ones! I'm also delighted to make Instagram friends. It's so nice and encouraging when you see regulars that consistently like your posts. I like as much as I can... if I like getting likes I am sure others do too but I don't just like for the sake if it. I do like what I like or find interesting and comment when I want to.
Other social platforms. This month I started on Twitter, Tumblr, and tapas. That's interesting they all begin with the letter "T." I've been having a hard time using them so we'll see.
Future goals...I would like to start drawing digitally; I think it will be easier especially when having to change things; Learning Photoshop; Creating a schedule for posting; Rotating themes; More focused Instagram.
On a personal note, I recently read an article one of my fb friends posted. It was about September being National Suicide Prevention Month. It highlighted people that are depressed and that there is no way of knowing who is actually dealing with it. It can be seemingly the most put together person and you would never know. Apparently there is an Instagram hashtag for those brave enough to admit it #faceofdepression. I think up until recently I never realized how many people actually have depression. I being one of them often try to hide it because I really don't know how to deal with it. I have been more open about it with others but I am still a work in progress. I think what I keep forgetting is that it is a chemical imbalance in the brain. I keep feeling guilty for feeling the way I do.
Reading some of the highlighted posts it really resonates with me. There is no "look" to depression. It's a chemical imbalance that doesn't just go away. I am depressed but I still want to get better. I am depressed and I am still optimistic. I am depressed but I still want to succeed. I am depressed and still have days were I am more assertive and bold then others. I fight through not wanting to do things because I have to. I am a functionally depressed individual. I actually saved a quote because in a nutshell that's almost exactly it:
On a personal note, I recently read an article one of my fb friends posted. It was about September being National Suicide Prevention Month. It highlighted people that are depressed and that there is no way of knowing who is actually dealing with it. It can be seemingly the most put together person and you would never know. Apparently there is an Instagram hashtag for those brave enough to admit it #faceofdepression. I think up until recently I never realized how many people actually have depression. I being one of them often try to hide it because I really don't know how to deal with it. I have been more open about it with others but I am still a work in progress. I think what I keep forgetting is that it is a chemical imbalance in the brain. I keep feeling guilty for feeling the way I do.
Reading some of the highlighted posts it really resonates with me. There is no "look" to depression. It's a chemical imbalance that doesn't just go away. I am depressed but I still want to get better. I am depressed and I am still optimistic. I am depressed but I still want to succeed. I am depressed and still have days were I am more assertive and bold then others. I fight through not wanting to do things because I have to. I am a functionally depressed individual. I actually saved a quote because in a nutshell that's almost exactly it:
"You can't tell can you? You can't tell by the look in my eyes or the sound of my voice even. You're thinking "You're smiling though!" Yes. Yes, I am smiling. I smiled for you. I smiled so I don't make you feel bad. I don't want you to feel like I do. I also don't want you to feel like there is something you can do to make me "feel better". There isn't anything anyone can do. I have to work through it on my own. The worst part is that this bout snuck up on me. I recognize the familiarity of it all though. Empty Lonely Heavy Tired So tired Everything is loud Everything is annoying I have no patience I want to be left alone I want to stay in bed I don't want to work out I want to eat everything without cooking anything The best part is that I haven't felt like this in a very long time AND that I recognize it for what is. I'm the one who bakes and does crafts. You see that on the outside but you don't see the darkness inside. " - Monique Holley-ParkI have also been following a lot more comics and a few that hit on my feelings of depression are Beth Evans @bethevansart. I literally see all her comics and can relate. Another is @sarahanderson for mainly the social awkwardness and social anxiety aspect.
